FUCK.
FUCK.
FUCK.
FUCK.
FUCK.
FUCK.
FUCK.
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FUCK.
Last night when the exit polls came in, they looked really fucking worrying. But they were exit polls, best not to dwell – it’s not like they’ve asked that many people, in the grand scheme of things. Then the election coverage started, but fuck that, I went to bed. I can’t watch David Dimbleby all night. I slept, and I slept pretty well which makes a nice change – then 6am came around, my phone makes a buzz that wakes me up – I don’t have an alarm. BBC News was informing me that the Conservatives were on track. FUCK. This wasn’t good, I didn’t need to get up, it’s early and I’m unemployed: I want some decent sleep. Sleep wasn’t going to happen, was it? I spent the next three hours in bed just questioning WHY, WHY FUCKING WHY? would anyone think it’s a good idea to vote Conservative. Fucking hell. I couldn’t make my mind up, were people genuinely that ignorant that they hadn’t realised just how much more shit the country has been the last five years with Führer Cameron at the helm of the country? The privatisation of the NHS, bedroom tax, tuition fees rises, the what appears to be an ideological mission of the Tories to make the poor poorer and the rich richer, amongst other things. They have been downright evil. So are the people voting blue ignorant of this? Or do they (the only other logical explanation I could think of) have a core piece of their soul missing?
“They will sort out the economy” the people say, “you can’t trust Labour with it.” Not that I’m for trusting Labour, especially after the debacle of the Blair government. But have you seen which complete moron they put in charge of our countries finances? George fucking Osborne, the guy’s an idiot, well, not as much as of an idiot compared to the peasants in this country he’s convinced that he’s doing a good job. In fact, he’s created more new debt for the country than any Labour government combined. Fucking good job Gideon has been doing eh?
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So, five years back I vote for the first time. Fresh(er) faced teenage Fishlock, not that long after my 18th birthday the 2010 general election came around. I voted Lib Dem due to them having a bigger chance against the Tories, after having done my research as my political mind was still forming. What a mistake I made that time. A time in my life where I really didn’t know what I wanted to do (still don’t to be honest), everyone at my college was trying to perfect their personal statements and ensuring they were getting enough UCAS points to get into hopefully one of their first university choices. I gave up on the idea of uni, it was stressing me out and too much pressure, I didn’t want to gamble to pay £3,000+ for uni, ending with a likely £9,000+ of debt when I wasn’t sure if whatever I picked I really cared about, then I’d be stuck with this debt and commitment of trying to get a degree or doing the likely thing that would have happened – dropping out. I could just apply next year when my mind is all clear and I can make more assertive decisions, who knows maybe that Nick Clegg guy will get into government and he wants to scrap tuition fees all together. HA, what a fucking idiot I was then, I didn’t realise then that all that happens in an election is they just bullshit their way into power and don’t mean a fucking word.
So, I dropped the idea of uni completely while I became for the first of many times, a “NEET” (not in education, employment or training), as some arsehole politicians liked to call the newly found and undecided place I had ended up in. Was it too early to blame the newly formed coalition government? Well it certainly was them for them to blame me for not wanting to pursue any more education, and as fast as they were to say that “NEET” people were a problem, they hadn’t done much to sort it. Alas I ended up in employment for six months, then getting my “contract terminated” (my then boss said we would call it that but what he really told me was that I was not “financially viable” to them, after they failed to give me proper training and paying me the minimum wage whilst talking to me like a piece of shit) just in time to move out from my mum’s house… Fucking brilliant. It’s not all bad though, I managed to save a bit – but more importantly, this is Britain, a first world country with a welfare system in place for us for when these unfortunate times happen – guess you could say goodbye to that now though, with it getting disastrously worse in the last few years the Tories are certain to ruin it further and even more damage people’s lives, mostly due to the greed of those in Westminster.
I spent a good long time unemployed, it’s not a fun place to be; going down the job centre for a fortnightly interrogation. The Conservatives by this point had very much made a lot of the country see the unemployed as a scapegoat for the country’s economic fuck ups, it was actually their personal friends at the head of banks who you should really be attacking. I had to endure things such as my slightly maniac of a housemate writing things such as “fishlock is a jobless cunt” on the bathroom mirror so it would show in the steam after I showered. I feel that I may have found employment a bit faster with some more government help, if Job Centres did what their role should be and help you into work, instead of forcing you into shit jobs and treating you like the scum of the earth. But this is what happens when you have a Tory at the top, thanks to Iain Duncan Smith, the man at the top of Department of Work and Pensions who likes to claim ridiculous expenses. According to him, IDS could live on the measly amount he deemed okay to pay our country’s unemployed – looking at his list of expenses I’d be fucking surprised if he could and he’s always unwilling to take the challenge he got given a few years ago and actually live on that amount for a week.
Eventually I ended up on “The Work Programme”, something thought up by the Conservatives to try and force you into work. It’s pretty fucked up and corrupt, I got sent to a company called A4e, aside from the fact my personal advisor did actually have a good heart and put in tons of effort for his cilents, if you do a simple google on the company you’ll probably see how many of them have got in trouble with the law for fraud relating to their role. It was pretty shit, but I was stuck and having to play the game or I would be yet another victim of many benefit sanctions that have happened over the past political term. One strong memory I have of A4e is them sending me to a CV workshop; naturally I bought a copy of my CV with me, the person running it picked it up and had a read, then she asked me if Connexions had made the CV for me. I told them how I had made it myself with some help from my step-mum, she then asked if my step-mum worked for connexions… This is how you get treated in these places; they couldn’t comprehend that I had the ability to make my own CV and quite competently to the point they felt they didn’t need to help me more with it, this is the stupid bullshit they make you waste your time with. I’m sure I could have better spent that time, like sending my CV out to potential employers, for example.
Another thing worth mentioning about A4e is how when they get you a job, they get a bonus: it doesn’t matter on the job, it doesn’t matter even if it’s them who get you the job or if you do it without their help. If you have a degree and they get you a job as a street cleaner, they get a bonus in their pay packet and reach their bonus better. This is perhaps how I came to be in employment again, for a bargain shop in the pit stain of Reading, where due to lack of being paid well enough to afford the bus I had to walk 40+ minutes every day to work, past many other people suffering under a Tory government, they feel compelled to wonder the streets in the morning with cans of Tennet’s Super in their hands. Fortunately in the just under 2 years I worked there I only got threatened with a mugging one time.
I really didn’t particularly want this job, ages away from my home, paying me less than my benefits were, so it became a struggle to both pay rent and eat food. Being under 25 I clearly can’t get working tax credits, and that’s certainly wasn’t going to change any time soon under a Tory Government. This company only liked 20 hour contracts you see, so people only did four hour shifts every day so more work is done when they aren’t legally obliged to give you a break. Needless to say once zero-hour contracts came into existence under our Tory government the company started dishing them out to the new staff. Filled with young people struggling under Cameron’s Britain, it’s no surprise a lot of people ended up getting the sack for stealing; I even know one who evaded being sacked while stealing enough food to feed his kids – good on him I say.
This time in my life was fucking miserable, and to be honest I feel it is directly related to the Conservative government we had at the time (but hey at least the Lib Dems were part of it too – hahahaha, like fuck they had anyone’s backs, the two-faced power hungry sell outs). I had fuck all money, was being paid fuck all money, my overdraft ended up existing just so I could survive, I would go to work every day and be treated fucking horribly, bullied at times by the various bosses we got switched between at the time. The only thing keeping me sane at this time was the friends in the DIY punk scene I had made over the last few years and the fun times we were managing to have, then eventually the gigs I put on, alongside the cannabis that helped with the anxiety and stress of living my life like this.
After switching to another shit bargain shop after being too fucked around by the last one, and getting more per hour to do less work it was more shocking to learn how these places operate in the form of paying their staff the smallest amount possible. But pressuring the workload as much as possible, they wanted us to do less hours so they could pay us less, luckily in the retail climate towards Christmas there wasn’t too many early finishes.
By this time I had gained an escape plan, which included moving to Bristol so instead of going home depressed daily to smoke myself to sleep I would go move in with some of my best friends and get to be more actively involved with the DIY scene and most importantly my close friends in Will Tun and the Wasters, I’m sure I’d still end up in a shit job or what not, but at least I’d have my friends – which is definitely something to hold on to in this bleak time of a Tory majority government. Do you know what’s really hard when you’re trying to afford to move? Being paid barely above minimum wage with a company who aren’t contractually obliged to give you x amount of hours a week. If it wasn’t for parental help in paying the deposit on my room in Bristol I don’t think I would have legitimately been able to do so and I would be trapped in that terrible shelf-stacking dead end job – like many are, not everyone is as lucky as me to have parents in a position to help with a few hundred pounds (I will note that my parents are far from ‘well off’ and it is a hit for them to help me in this way so I am in a grateful place). Under a different government the unprivileged might have a better chance of surviving and progressing their life in a way they want instead of the likely case of being trapped within a zero-hours contract barely surviving – a direct repercussion of Conservative party policies.
Although I kind of put myself in the position, it was obvious I would end up unemployed as I currently am in Bristol. It’s interesting to see how much worse the welfare system had got since I last left it years ago, the Job Centre appears to be in place as a punishment system for the unemployed, trying to weed out any pathetic excuse they can get to sanction you, from not managing to sign on due to being in hospital or a job interview, it’s not a system there to help you into work, it’s there to punish you into work. Personally I still strive on, I know what I care about in life and that’s why I focus on making some really great DIY shows happen, and contributing to this excellent website I’m writing for now, and forever helping out bands in any way I can (currently getting largely into booking for bands). I don’t do these things for profit, although maybe make small pocket money amounts occasionally, it would be great if we did have a system, such as under the Green Party (aka the only sane party currently active in this country) where we had a universal basic income I could survive much more easily while being able to focus and push the things I care about, as much as it would kind of feel wrong to make money from music it would be nice if one day it did become my living (as long as I keep my moral standpoint) but under a Tory majority Government I can’t help but feel that this is just an unattainable dream.
This has been my personally experience under a Tory/Lib Dem COALITION, I can’t imagine what it’s going to be like under a Conservative MAJORITY government, but even fucking worse I imagine. Everyone has their own story and experience and most are extremely negative, and many more far far worse than mine. To wake up this morning to follow the news from seeing all the now former leaders resigning, to see it looking like a Tory majority to it becoming a Tory majority for sure, it’s been a sad and emotional morning. We all knew it would probably end up bad, but not this bad, who are these people thinking it’s a wise idea to vote Tory? Ignorant or evil? I can’t decide, but I can’t see it being one or the other.
Aside from the bankers and corporate heads and the politicians themselves, nobody wins under a Tory government and continued austerity which we will now be faced with. Theresa May is already ready to push through the scary snoopers chart they couldn’t manage before; we don’t have the Lib Dems to water them down any more. Were you punishing Clegg for joining the Tories by voting for them instead? Were you punishing Milliband for being really shit at PR but ultimately comparatively not that awful a politician? If you didn’t vote or voted Tory you have allowed the next horrible 5 years to happen, well fucking done (not that any of the wonderful readers of Seeing Your Scene are likely to be in that category).
The unemployed are FUCKED. Pensioners are FUCKED. Single mothers are FUCKED. The working class are FUCKED. The disabled are FUCKED. Immigrants are FUCKED. Minimum wage workers are FUCKED. Foxes are FUCKED.
“Never trust a tory they’ll betray you when it matters” – ONSIND
Epic